From: OUTspoken
Date: October 18, 2019
Subject: Hoco, more like HOMO AMIRITE FRIENDS????

The OUTspoken web banner. There are rainbow hexagons on a white background and the OUTspoken logo is placed above red, yellow, green, and blue lines.

I'm going to be 100% honest with you. I legit forgot what the subject line of this email is even though I entered it on the last page.

Alright, I'm tired. Let's make this quick so I can get back to my apartment and play some Final Fantasy VIII. (How much do you wanna bet that this will not be quick? I'm starting at 6:40. Ready, set, go.)

Events! Because those are things that are happening soon!
Lesbian Herstory Archives is happening on October 22nd at 7pm in the fireside lounge. Dr. Bek Orr from SUNY Brockport will be visiting and talking about lesbians! Yay! (Fetishizing CisHet Men DO NOT INTERACT.) Often times queer history is erased so I'm super pumped to be able to just chill out and learn about it! (and not have to spend hours on an assignment for something that legitimately interests me, but then the hours of work and fatigue kill my enthusiasm and interest in the topic because all I want is for it to be over and never think about it again. I'm not talking about my tenth grade history project, what makes you say that?) Interpreters have been requested. (we all know that's just a polite way of saying we asked for interpreting so this event can be accessible but they're trying to figure out if this event is important enough to allow Deaf/HoH people to be able to enjoy. No tea no shade.) 

There will be a Drag Show in Ingle Auditorium on October 25th. Now, you're probably wondering, "Elizabeth, what time is the event?" Well, dear reader, that is a very good question about a very vital piece of information that would be very useful to know. (AKA, I don't know, nobody told us the time when they told us about the event.)

ritGA apple picking is happening next Saturday, October 26th, from 10am to 1pm! If you can drive people that would be really cool, because some of us don't have cars since we don't have our driver's license and instead are on our second learner's permit because the first one got lost in Washington DC on an eleventh grade field trip. If you want to go, just fill out this form!

Speaking of forms, if you have ever came out to someone, tell us your story! It can be anonymous, and we really want to get a bunch of stories so we can bring back Queerbook this year. 

I feel like there's other stuff I need to mention...........maybe if I type out enough periods I'll remember.....................................OH!

Global Union's Halloween party is on October 31st from 6pm to 9pm in the SAU, and OUTspoken will be there! We got some super cool Halloween themed pride buttons, and we're going to be doing candy apple making! 

Alright, looks like it took me about fifty minutes to write it this time. I should probably get some food because I haven't eaten an actual meal today. As always, follow us on social media for memes and events that are coming up that may be of interest! (Also if you do it validates me as Director of Marketing.) 

~ Elizabeth Sherrock (she/her)
Director of Marketing

A picture of a blue and black vacuum cleaner sitting in the corner of the room with a maroon foldable lawn chair leaned against it.

Remember the condom taste test video I mentioned in the last email? Well, I finally finished editing it and captioning it! You can view it on Facebook here, and once I do some Advanced Technological Manuvers to overlay the text from the caption file on the video so that it can be captioned on Instagram and Twitter! (I'm going to just do a screen recording while I play the Facebook video with closed captions on) Speaking of which.........

  • We have flavored condoms! We have so many. So so so many. 
  • We also have regular non-flavored condoms! Again, we have so many.
  • A volleyball
  • A practically empty bottle of Windex
  • My graded Probability and Statistics quiz from a few weeks ago
  • Three pairs of red scissors
  • Our very own colored printer that ITS doesn't like so it can't connect to the office computer
  • Bryan's leftover cardboard that I will try to use for my Halloween costume (I'm going to try to be a GameCube because I think that would be hilarious.)
  • A dirty OUTspoken mug
  • Marissa's Ozzi box that she still hasn't taken out of the office
  • One tired ace lesbian (me) 

I have included a picture of a vacuum cleaner. There are three vacuum cleaners in my apartment. That is more vacuum cleaners than needed. If anyone is interested in taking this vacuum cleaner (or one of our six frying pans in our kitchen) please let me know. I cannot stress this enough: I DO NOT WANT THIS VACUUM CLEANER.